How to Talk to Your Kids About Scary News: Simple, Effective Scripts for All Ages
- Caitlin Kindred
- 30 minutes ago
- 5 min read
I'm coming to you today with a heavy heart and a racing mind.
And since you're reading this, there's a good chance you understand what I'm saying.
I've seen several posts—and even made one myself—about how we're in the middle of one of the scariest experiences in our country's history, and yet, life hasn't stopped.
Laundry. Lunches. Vet visits. Broken freezers. (Yes, this actually happened to me.)
Nothing about this is normal.
But what IS normal is whatever you're feeling right now.
And I bet your kids are picking up on your feelings. Kids notice tension, tone, and headlines, even if adults avoid the topic.
So, I'm offering a few tips for how to have those conversations—because staying silent isn't the answer.
Listen Here
First, the Ground Rules: Talking to Your Kids About Scary News
Before we get into scripts, let's establish some ground rules:
You don't have to have all the answers to have a good conversation with your kid.
Our job isn't to download the news into their brains. It's to help them feel safe, heard, and empowered to ask questions.
Your default line:
"Sometimes grownups are worried about things happening in the world. If you've heard people talking about it, you can always ask me questions. I might not know everything, but I'll always be honest with you in a way that feels safe."
Scripts by Age Band
You know I love a good sentence frame. Steal these lines and tweak the wording for your own family.
Younger Kids (4-8)
Goals: Safety, simple truth, reassurance. Very limited detail; focus on what adults are doing to keep them safe.
When they hear scary words: "You might hear grown-ups talking about something upsetting on the news. It's not your job to fix it. That's a job for adults, and we're working on it."
When they ask "What happened?": "Something unfair is happening, and lots of adults are working hard to make it better. You are safe here with us."
When they see protests: "Those people are gathering to tell leaders what they think is fair and unfair. That's something people are allowed to do when they care a lot about something."
Boundaries script: "That's a really big question. I love that you're thinking about it. I'm going to give you a smaller answer today, and when you're older, we can talk about more details."
Tweens (9-12)
Goals: Add context and critical thinking. Validate big feelings (anger, worry, confusion).
Opening a conversation: "You may have seen things online or heard kids at school talking about [event]. What have you heard so far?"
To validate emotions: "It makes sense that you feel [scared/angry/confused]. A lot of people feel that way, including adults."
To explain complicated issues: "Some leaders are making rules that a lot of people feel are unfair. People are speaking up, voting, and organizing to try to change those rules."
Boundary + honesty combo: "I don't know all the details yet, and I don't want to give you half-right information. How about we look up a kid-friendly explanation together after dinner?"
Teens (13+)
Goals: Treat them as emerging citizens. Invite their opinions, emphasize agency and media literacy.
Opening without lecturing: "You've probably seen more about this on your feed than I have. What's your take on what's happening?"
To encourage critical thinking: "How do you know which posts to trust? What makes a source feel reliable to you?"
To acknowledge powerlessness: "It's totally valid to feel like one person can't do much. Most change happens when a lot of 'one persons' do small things together."
Boundary script: "I want to keep talking about this, but I'm hitting my own emotional wall. Can we take a break and come back to it tomorrow?"
A Simple 3-Step Framework
Here's a structure you can remember and reuse. Tweak the language to suit your style and family.
Step 1: Ask What They Know
Script: "What have you heard or seen about this?"
This lets you correct misinformation and avoid oversharing.
Step 2: Name the Feeling + Basic Facts
Script: "It sounds like you feel [feeling]. A simple way to explain this is: [one or two sentences]."
Important: Avoid labeling, e.g., calling people “bad guys.” It's not helpful, and it could even increase your kid(s)' fear and confusion. Instead, talk about people being in pain, being angry, and making bad choices.
Example: "It sounds like you're worried. Some leaders are making rules that hurt people. Many others are working hard to protect people's rights."
Step 3: Offer Safety + One Action
Script: "Here's what our family is doing about it: [donating, calling, learning, helping neighbors]. And here's how you can help if you want to: [draw a card, come to a community event, help pick a charity]."
When Conversations Go Wrong
I'm not a perfect parent, and I mess up these conversations all the time. Maybe you can relate?
Here are some common challenges and scripts to help:
When You Overshare
"I realized I shared more than I meant to, and that might have felt scary. I'm sorry. What I really want you to know is that you're safe, and there are a lot of people working on this."
When the Kid Shuts Down
"I hear that you don't want to talk about it right now. That's okay. If you ever change your mind or have questions later, I'm here."
When They Ask "Are We Going to Be Okay?"
For younger kids: "Right now, you are safe. Many adults are working hard to keep our community safe."
For older kids: "I can't promise nothing bad will ever happen, but I can promise you won't face it alone. We will face hard things together and keep looking for ways to help."
The Bottom Line
You don't need perfect words; you just need to show up.
Kids benefit more from a slightly messy, honest conversation than from silence.
Pick one script from today, put it in your Notes app, and try it the next time your kid asks about something on the news.
You've got this.
Want more support? Listen to the full episode for even more scripts, scenarios, and permission to mess up while still showing up for your kids.
Bios
Caitlin is a former middle school teacher. Jenny is a current middle school assistant principal. Both are current parents, and people navigating these scary times alongside you. They’re here to normalize feeling overwhelmed and offer practical scripts that work—because you don't need perfect words. You just need to show up.
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